I have a confession to make. I’m a little bit obsessed with YouTube interior design and styling vlogs. When I come across a vlogger I love, I always head over to their Insta to learn a bit more about them. It’s nice to watch all their tips and tricks when it comes to styling spaces. It’s also nice when they sit in front of the camera and share their own struggles, experiences and vulnerabilities. Their stories create moments of connection that allow us, the viewer, to relate and bond with them on a more personal level. It’s nice to sit back and think wow someone else is going through that too.

I think it’s so important in this world of social media, where everything is curated to perfection, that we share the hard times we’re going through. It’s time to be a bit more real in front of whatever medium we are using.

Late last year on my Instagram stories I shared the aftermath of a panic attack. There was a myriad of small circumstances throughout the day that led to it. However, it was one incident in particular that pushed me over the edge. It was a struggle to share as it brought me to a new level of vulnerability. The messages I received after that post were lovely. There was so much thankfulness for sharing about my own struggle. The thing I loved most though was that there was a connection that I created with all of you. My hope is that my vulnerability continues to create connection with you all and that you all know that those on the other side of the screen don’t always have it all together.

I thought it would be fitting to kick off 2020 with a little bit of a life update.

We’re already one month into the new decade. Now, if your stomach flipped over as you read and then reread that sentence – do not fear! Head over to my post here and together we can regroup and refocus on ways to achieve your goals this year.

Looking back at 2019, I didn’t think it would start or end the way it did. I remember so clearly how I started the year with a new job and perspective on life. However, after the first day I was a bit numb. Funnily enough, the next day – 7 days into 2019, I had a panic attack and decided to not continue with the job I had just been given, in the field I love, natural health. The next few weeks I spent uncovering my triggers and rebuilding myself through a lot of compassion and selfcare.

During that time, I set myself some goals. I was going to launch and be so dedicated to my blog, post weekly, develop so many new recipes and grow my audience but, instead life threw a thousand curve balls at me and here I am today a master of multitasking.

The last time I sat down and did any form of blogging was about March 2019. Since then I’ve felt a bit like a hamster on a wheel constantly running, not burning out per se as I’m finding so much joy in all that I’m doing at the moment – but that doesn’t mean I’m not tired.

So, what was I doing in 2019 and what’s in store for me this year?

Well, apart from my nutrition degree I decided to pick back up my other degree, which I had deferred for a year. That’s a Bachelor of Theology for those of you playing at home. Now, I admit that I really struggled to find balance studying two completely different degrees. In addition to that I was volunteering and was offered a role within my church, and have been working there since August 2019. As a result, my blog endeavours were put on hold.

A lot happened throughout 2019, and it’s nice to reflect on it all. However, the biggest thing to happen was that my PCOS was officially put into remission. In all honesty I like to say healed.  While I put in a lot of effort to healing my body naturally, I know that there was also a lot that went on spiritually as well.

When my doctor said the words “I wouldn’t classify you as having PCOS, nor if I just met you and saw these results would have ever through you had it,” was nothing short of a miracle. Why, well PCOS isn’t something that can be cured and here I am symptom free. With no sign of insulin resistance, and regular periods. Something I haven’t experienced in many many years.

So this year, while I continue studying and working, I plan to bring in a bit more balance. I plan to reignite this blog and create for you some new and tasty recipes.

To sum it all up.

I just want to say thank you for following along the journey. I truly believe that if you are here waiting for your miracle it is coming. You just need to let go and wait.

There is so much learn in the waiting.

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